To Ass Bombers And Beyond!

Here comes the al Qaeda Rump Rangers, the Pussy Patrols, and now the Implant Infantry, with explosives in every orifice and more. Coming soon to an airport near you, body cavity searches and even more intrusive screening methods. Enjoy your flight!

Al Qaeda looks at surgical implants to get a bomb past airport security

Al Qaeda operatives in Yemen recently discussed surgically implanting an explosive device under the skin of a suicide bomber to get past airport detectors and blow up a U.S.-bound passenger plane, a U.S. official said Wednesday.

There is no indication of an immediate plot, but the government has warned airlines, stepped up security at U.S. airports and encouraged other countries to adjust security measures.

The focus is mostly on international flights, but domestic passengers are likely to see more bomb-sniffing dogs and an increased use of swabs that test for traces of explosive material on hands and luggage.

See also:
Al Qaeda ‘Belly Bombs’ Entirely Possible, Doctor Says
US warns of new ‘belly bomb’ terror threat
Airport scanners would not catch an implant bomber: Admission as officials announce ‘more passenger interaction’
Al Qaeda plots to implant bombs in fanatics to beat body scanners
US warns airlines of threat of ‘implanted bombs’
Beware new breast implant bomb, feds warn: Terrorists may try to sneak in explosives in implants
Terrorist threat of ‘human bombs’ means tighter airport security
TSA warns of implant bombers, prepares fliers for swab tests
Threat of Human Bombs Could Make Flying Difficulties Even Worse
American airports warned of potential ‘belly bomb’ threat
Qaeda plots body bombs
The new terrorist threat: undetectable, surgically implanted bombs
TSA Warns of Possibility of Surgically Implanted Bombs
TSA warns airlines of explosive implants in people’s bodies
Terrorists may try to surgically implant bombs in their bodies, TSA warns

Putting aside just how effective an explosive detonated inside the body would actually be, it’s a threat and so we have to try and defend against it, and that means al Qaeda has already won just by making the threat. As much as al Qaeda would love to take down a few airliners, their main objective is to cause as much economic damage and societal inconvenience as possible to our Western way of life and this sure ought to do it.

/unless we’re going to start doing some serious profiling in conjunction with comprehensive intelligence, we really have no practical defense against the concept of a “body bomb”, without performing prison style body cavity searches and cranking those x-ray machines up past eleven

Looking Forward To 2010

/Michael Ramirez

And You Think The TSA Sucks Now?

No unions for air safety workers

As 2009 comes to a blessed close, let us pause and give thanks to Sen. Jim DeMint, the South Carolina Republican who placed a legislative hold on President Obama’s nomination of Erroll Southers to head the Transportation Security Administration. DeMint won’t withdraw his hold until Southers answers a simple question — does he think TSA employees should be allowed to collectively bargain with the government on workplace rules and procedures? To date, Southers has declined to give a definitive response to DeMint’s question, even though it’s importance was highlighted by the attempted Christmas Day massacre of nearly 300 people aboard Northwest Airlines Flight 253 by Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab. The 23-year-old Nigerian Muslim terrorist boarded the Detroit-bound flight despite having explosives sewn into his knickers.

Southers’ silence hasn’t prevented others from greeting his nomination warmly, most notably John Gage, president of the American Federation of Government Employees. When Southers nomination was announced by the Obama White House, Gage said “the question of bargaining rights at TSA is not a matter of ‘if’ but ‘when.’ We are confident that the appointment of Mr. Southers as administrator will help put that matter to bed.”

Southers’ immediate boss as TSA administrator would be Department of Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano, who is an enthusiastic supporter of collective bargaining for government employees in her department. When asked about this recently by DeMint during a Senate hearing, Napolitano responded “I do not think security and collective bargaining are mutually exclusive, nor do I think that collective bargaining cannot be accomplished by an agency, such as TSA, should the workers desire to be organized in such a fashion.”

These things should not have to be explained, but here are four common-sense reasons why collective bargaining would cripple the TSA:

á The TSA would lose its flexibility to move people and equipment and change protocols when it believes there is a terrorist threat to airliners.

á Collective bargaining would force TSA managers to share sensitive intelligence information with union negotiators every time new workplace procedures are needed, thus increasing the possibility of damaging leaks about those procedures.

á TSA managers would no longer be able to reward high-performing screeners or fire those unable or unwilling to perform their duties in an efficient manner. Being able to do so is critical to the TSA’s ability to defend American airline travelers against future terrorist attacks.

á Hundreds of TSA screeners would have to be diverted from the jobs they were hired to do in order to set up the negotiating infrastructure required by collective bargaining.

DeMint should keep his hold on Southers’ nomination in place until these issues are addressed in a public hearing.

See also:
DeMint blocks nomination of Obama’s TSA pick
Sen. DeMint Is Outraged That TSA Members Could Get Collective Bargaining Rights After Recent Terrorism Attempt on Airplane
Senate Democratic spokesman: Blocking of air safety chief ‘disgraceful’
Senate Majority Leader to Force Vote on Key TSA Nominee
Kristol: If Southers Matters, Recess Appoint Him
GOP Senator Says Dems Trying to Rush TSA Nominee
Sen. Harry Reid to force vote on TSA nominee
DeMint Defends Holding Up Confirmation of Erroll Southers as TSA Chief
Federal labor unions push back against senator’s TSA ‘hold’
Napolitano wants to unionize TSA employees despite safety concerns
Nomination of Southers for TSA becomes a union issue

Boy, am I sure glad I don’t need to fly regularly. I feel sorry for those of you who do.

/because, you know, TSA is so good now, you can bet they’ll be ten times better when they’re unionized with union work rules, just look at the auto industry!

Man Caused Disaster Calling

/Michael Ramirez

Homeland Security, Without the Security

Massive TSA Security Breach As Agency Gives Away Its Secrets

In a massive security breach, the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) inadvertently posted online its airport screening procedures manual, including some of the most closely guarded secrets regarding special rules for diplomats and CIA and law enforcement officers.

The most sensitive parts of the 93-page Standard Operating Procedures manual were apparently redacted in a way that computer savvy individuals easily overcame.

The document shows sample CIA, Congressional and law enforcement credentials which experts say would make it easy for terrorists to duplicate.

The improperly redacted areas indicate that only 20 percent of checked bags are to be hand searched for explosives and reveal in detail the limitations of x-ray screening machines.

“This is an appalling and astounding breach of security that terrorists could easily exploit,” said Clark Kent Ervin, the former inspector general at the Department of Homeland Security. “The TSA should immediately convene an internal investigation and discipline those responsible.”

“This shocking breach undercuts the public’s confidence in the security procedures at our airports,” said Senator Susan Collins, R-Me., ranking Republican member of the Senate Homeland Security and Governmental Affairs Committee. “On the day before the Senate Homeland Security Committee’s hearing on terrorist travel, it is alarming to learn that the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) inadvertently posted its own security manual on the Internet.”

“This manual provides a road map to those who would do us harm,” said Collins. “The detailed information could help terrorists evade airport security measures.” Collins said she intended to ask the Department of Homeland Security how the breach happened, and “how it will remedy the damage that has already been done.”

A TSA spokesperson says the document posted online is an outdated version “improperly posted by the agency to the Federal Business Opportunities Web site wherein redacted material was not properly protected.”

The TSA requested the document be taken offline, but by then it had spread around the Internet and is still available today.

Hey, you may as well read it yourself, especially if you fly, you can damn well bet the ranch that al Qaeda already has a copy and is studying it closely.

AVIATION SECURITY
SCREENING MANAGEMENT
STANDARD OPERATING
PROCEDURES

See also:
Secret airport screening practices revealed in manual posted online
Unredacted TSA Manual Leaked Online
Sensitive airport screening manual spent months online
TSA posts document on airport screening procedures online
TSA launches review after online release of screening procedures
Sensitive air security doc posted in error on Net
US airport security screening processes posted online
TSA Leaks Sensitive Airport Screening Manual
TSA Breach Exposes Passenger Screening Manual
TSA mistakenly posts screening secrets
TSA Screening Manual Posted Online
Oh D’Oh They Didn’t! TSA Posts Airport Screening Manual On Web

Don’t worry, your aviation safety is in the very best of hands, don’t you think? I’m pretty sure that al Qaeda wouldn’t dream of taking advantage of this classified information windfall, that wouldn’t be fighting fair.

/and if you don’t feel safe flying anymore, maybe you can ask Janet Napolitano for a ride to your destination in her Homeland Security clown car